99¸£ÀûÊÓƵ
by Christine Miller
The initial quarter of classes I took at 99¸£ÀûÊÓƵ was both exciting and intimidating. It was through one of my first and most memorable classes that I learned the value of intention. Without a concrete intent to work on something, I would get lost in other thoughts and distractions or procrastinate for another day. An intention gave me something to gauge my progress and success. It forced me to acknowledge my issues and be conscious of them, watching them arise in my mind and accepting them. This doesn’t mean that I view them as negative or try to fix a problem, but rather see the issues for what they are in non judgment.
The activity was to maintainÌýand build trust through exercises each week. To me, building trust isÌýa continual process that can never be completely finalized. After theÌýactivity was complete, I decided to journal about my reactions andÌýcreate an art doll in order to express my moments of insight andÌýsustain the conclusions I had drawn. The journals really helped meÌýpinpoint what was hidden and needed expressed, while the dollÌýsculptures helped me visualize creatively how to go about changingÌýcertain mindsets. The personal meaning I derived from this project isÌýportrayed openly in a few journal excerpts.
The first activity of an individual scavenger hunt posed a seriousÌýthreat to my physical sense of security. I was afraid of the weatherÌýand how my abilities might be compromised in searching for treasuresÌýduring a hail storm. I didn’t even realize I was talking myself out ofÌýthe situation and being negative until I focused and became mindful ofÌýmy thoughts. There seemed to be a war between my mind and spirit beingÌýwaged. The payoff at the end was well worth it though, as I got toÌýwitness the most spectacular array of rainbow colors contrastedÌýagainst a shrouded mysterious sky. It was like an interplay of forces,Ìýwhere chromatic color and light stood in sharp opposition to monotoneÌýrain clouds and darkness.
The second activity of a blind walk hike at night dealt withÌýinterpersonal relationships. Instead of finding trust from within, IÌýnow had to work with trusting another being. I wanted to stopÌýattaching so much worth to the outcome of a situation and insteadÌýfocus on learning and growth in the process. In this activity IÌýexpected to run into trees or fall, and figured my boyfriend would notÌýtake my safety seriously. He was actually very cautious and detailedÌýwith his descriptions to fit my available senses. This was a goodÌýactivity to focus on the process as well, because guiding someoneÌýthrough a world without sight literally needs to be taken one step atÌýa time. Later I realized that support and communication were the twoÌýmain factors that increased my trust. By feeling what it was like toÌýbe supported and openly communicated with, I can now utilize thisÌýinsight in the future.
Mindful meditation, another meaningful activity, came with opportuneÌýtiming the week I crashed my car. I knew from past experience that IÌýam a master of multitasking. I complete tasks simultaneously in orderÌýto get them all done and checked off my list. Without regard for theÌýtoll it is taking on my body and mind, I can definitely use some timeÌýto slow down and take life as it comes. I can more fully enjoy lifeÌýand the multitudes of tasks if I stay in the moment and devote myselfÌýwholeheartedly to them. If I can divide up the tasks of my day, andÌýgive some away it takes some of the weight off my shoulders and allowsÌýme to be more present in the activities I do chose to focus on.ÌýThere is no textbook solution for problems, instead empathy andÌýmindfulness are excellent tools in assessing where an exercise wouldÌýbe most beneficial. Incorporating visual elements to represent myÌýdiscoveries sought to bring them to life. These gave me points ofÌýreference for starting out, maintaining balance throughout theÌýprocess, and how to deal with end results in positive ways.
Stay tuned for Christine’s Workshop on Creating Dolls at Southwestern!Ìý
